This is Brian Harmon's personal blog about writing, publishing and life as a writer and stay-at-home dad.

Thursday, January 10, 2013

Getting Dirty

Having found some time on my hands, I started thinking about my work and how it fares in this ruthless market.  Eventually, I came upon an idea.  In an admittedly half-assed attempt to improve sales, I’ve decided to withdraw my work from circulation and turn my efforts toward a more profitable genre.  After doing some lazy and rather unreliable research, I’ve discovered that erotica appears to draw considerably more readers than horror and suspense, according to these guys on some forum I read.  As a result, the following changes have been made: 

From now on, The Box will be The Package and will be followed by its sequels, Gilbert’s House, The Dimples of the Blonde, Rod Receives the Wood, and Secret of the Librarian.  I have also made improvements to my short stories.  “The Man in the Fire,” after appropriate changes, will now be “The Man in the Fireman’s Hat.”  “Jeremy Fell” is now “Jeremy Felt” and “Low Tide” has become “Low Clyde.”  Also, “Children in the Dark” has been changed to “Chillin’ in the Dark.”  With full credit to my clever wife, “The Devil’s Walk” will hereby be re-titled “The Devil’s Banana.” 

“From Such Small Things” will keep its title. 

Also look forward to my brand new, full-length and frisky adventure, Blushed.  Available soon. 

Thank you for understanding.

(I should probably confirm at this point that this is, in fact, a joke and that I will not actually be removing any of my current titles from publication and replacing them with silly smut.  Otherwise, someone out there will send me an angry e-mail demanding that I deliver “The Devil’s Banana” promptly or be sued for false advertising.)

Check out all my (real) titles at and share this address with your friends.  Don’t let this reality come to pass!

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